On a recent bachelor party in Atlantic City, New Jersey I found myself shitfaced in a little dive on New York Ave called ***** Gentlemen’s Club. On first inspection it appeared to be a substandard Bikini dance club just off the boardwalk. The girls were ok looking for a 1:00 am bender but I wouldn’t recommend either sobriety or daylight when visiting. Some of the dancers had a little talent but nothing you couldn’t see in a place with a lower chance of getting Hepatitis. Most of the girls just stuck their ass in the air and didn’t even try that hard to earn their singles. I found this unusual but figured that since they apparently were fresh from Russia they hadn’t figured out the game yet. Considering my responsibility as a journalist for Defining Moment Online I felt compelled to get a lap dance and see what they had to offer.

I picked a blonde who seemed a little more motivated than her coworkers and dropped 25 bucks for a couch dance. She led me upstairs to a small room without a door and proceeded to perform a surprising good lap dance. Considering the size of the two guys at the cash register I was very careful to follow the standard rules we all know and hate but about halfway through though she grabbed my hand and proceeded to…, well use your imagination but laws were violated. At this point she whispered “for $150 you get to lay down for a half hour in a closed room” she then proceeded to describe the opportunity she was offering in detail. That’s when I realized that downstairs wasn’t a strip club but a showroom. Luckily or unluckily depending on your point of view I hadn’t taken that much cash and considering most of the girls and several of the very large men working there were all Russian I was not about to use the mac machine. Anyways, paying is not my thing and I wasn’t about to start in a place this shady.

As it got later the propositions got more open and cheaper, two for one and I can take them with me and so on. A short plump girl in a schoolgirl outfit was practically begging, “I’ve only made 50 bucks and should have 800 by now come on upstairs I’ll make it worth it” and so on. At this point I was ready to go but considering it was 3:00 am in a pretty shitty neighborhood I wasn’t leaving alone so I grabbed a $5 beer and waited for several of the younger members of my group to drain their bank accounts, I hope they know of a good free clinic. In summary the place was a dive but if you are in A.C. and really need a blowjob ***** is a guarantee score.

BW
July 21st, 2005

EDITOR'S NOTE: Establishment names have been removed to avoid legal issues.